Man, my hands keep shaking. It's really noticeable, too. It makes me think of Collette when we were in high school. I wonder if she still shakes, and either way I wonder why she did back then...
I thought it was because of lack of food, but I ate plenty yesterday and still shook like crazy. I mean, to the point that I had trouble opening poptarts and taking the cap off my pen.
San Francisco was awesome, but way, way too short. I love R so very very much. When I look him I swear my whole body lights up. My heart swells. He is my best friend, my comfort, my ally. He's the best thing to happen to me and I would do pretty much anything to keep him. So why am I so nervous that things won't pan out? He reassures me sometimes, but I feel like his snail pace in regards to our relationship means he doesn't want this -- doesn't want me. And that's a terrible feeling to have. I wish I could have more patience. I keep thinking that to take my mind off it, I need friends. I have no one to go to but him, and as much as I love him I don't want to be focused on him 24/7.
School started. It's gonna be a heavy semester. Hopefully I'll get through it, but right now I'm on edge. I haven't been able to afford the textbooks so have been flying blind all week. I should be able to get them tomorrow... if I don't, I might as well drop the classes.
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